I had this really cute candle I bought at the store last fall and I burned it quite often.  The scent was called Harvest Bakery and all I know is that it smelled amazing and it was in this adorable container.  Recently, while it was burning next to my bathtub, it went out.  It was done.  Finished.  At that moment, I realized how much my life right now was like that candle.  Maybe you're going through the same thing too.

We've all heard the phrase, "bloom where you're planted."   It really is a great little quote to share but even more so, to meditate on.  We all have a past and parts of our past we tend to grieve on the regular.  Maybe you grieve those moments in the kitchen with Grandma, or watching. your kids sled down the neighborhoods favorite hill; maybe, you grieve for loved ones that have moved out and moved on or for just the moments spent with those you care so much about.  We all do it, and sometimes we can let grief keep us in a dormant state.

In early January, I pulled up my Etsy app and started searching for Peonies.  They are my absolute favorite flower.  They graced my mothers front walk way and my grandmothers back door.  I just think they are the most majestic flowers and I have decided that I want every kind I can find.  There is a great little Etsy shop that is based just north of us and shares the same planting zone.  I decided to take a chance on some mail order Peonies.  They arrived fairly quickly and because I love receiving packages I was also quick to open the box.  I was excited to find 3 pots of dirt, wrapped in plastic and surrounded by packing peanuts.  I pulled each pot out of its plastic and it literally just looked like a pot of dirt.  Somewhere beneath all of that soil that was shipped was a plant, a dormant plant.

Being that it was still January, I let the little ladies hang out in  our basement for the time being.  We had not yet even built our front porch on our house and I want them to be tucked in around our front porch.  I would have to wait.  They would also have to wait and remain dormant.  Then there was a really beautiful, warm winters day today.  Our porch is built but unfortunately not yet ready for landscaping.  I was a little anxious to see how my baby Peonies were doing so I pulled them out of the basement from their box and carried them out to debate on what I should do based on their conditions.

Sprouts.  Sprouts were poking up just ever so slightly, beginning to reach for the sky in search of the life giving sunlight.  My baby girl and I pull out my grandmothers 3 concrete planters and prepared them to receive my three precious Peonies.  We carefully transplanted each.  These are the moments when I wish I had a small green house. (Hmmm,  I think that will be my next project.). I want to make sure those little ladies are well protected and able to thrive.  I've put so much thought and have been so careful to make sure they can reach their full potential.

See, flowers and trees really have such a neat life.  The go about life doing what they were created to do.  The may flower, bloom, bud, or just stay green all year.  More than anything, every little plant has one goal, just one.  To grow as tall as it can!  It is going to reach and stretch with all its might to the sun until it can reach no further.  Many factors will come into play to determine just how far it can reach.  If conditions are just right it will thrive.  If conditions are not just right, it will struggle.  

Struggle & Thrive

Now, there's a thought.  As I was planting my little Peonies I prayed that they would thrive.  I wanted the best for those little plants because if they reach their full potential, they will bring so much joy to all who meet them when they are clothed in all their flowering glory.

Isn't that kind of like us as women?  We are planted and we are told we should bloom where we are planted.  How can we ever reach our full potential though if we aren't given the right conditions, no matter how much we want to bloom.  If the conditions we are in aren't conducive to thriving, what are we to do?  The answer is so very simple.  Pray.

Romans 8:28 gives us confidence that everything we endure is used for God's glory, for a greater purpose, for good.  We know that when we are in His hands, not matter the circumstances or conditions, He will make it all right.  Even if it's grief, you don't have to stay dormant.

I want to encourage you, that if you don't feel you are thriving in this life to ask God if you are planted where you ought to be.  Are you in the best place so that He can use your life and make it beautiful?  If you don't feel that is so then just ask Him to plant you in the right place.  Ask Him to begin to surround you with people who can encourage you, speak life into you, pray for you, and help you see yourself as God sees you.  Ask Him to send life giving words your way, favor, and to uproot you from where you are if the conditions aren't what He sees as His best for you.  Don't be afraid of being uprooted when you are in His hands.  Sometimes that's just what we need to leave our dormant place and begin to grow where we have not.  Sometimes it's what we need to get the conditions just right for thriving.
​

Six months ago, my family of 7 put everything we owned on truck beds and trailers and stored as much as we could, nearly everything.  We moved into a camper and a small cabin between us.  It's not what I personally would consider ideal but it works for us.  In the mean time, I have watched our new house rise out of the ground.  We are thriving and making progress.  My kids have discovered that they can actually play in nature and enjoy it.  We have become closer as a family than I could have ever imagined.  We've even add a really sweet dog to the mix who is our protector and friend.

God took what might look like a mess and misery to others and has made it beautiful.  In the end, we have prayed over and over that we do not owe one single cent on our house.  We own our land free and clear but a house is a different story.  It sounds impossible to some.  

Your circumstances maybe currently be ideal and perfect for you and your family to thrive. I pray that is the case for more and more families.  However, as I have friends that reach out concerning needing prayer various circumstances I find it so very heart breaking that they just are not thriving.  I have seen doors open and doors close for them and for others.  I have seen God move and make a way were there shouldn't be a way.  I have seen God drench families in His love and He has radically changed their circumstances so that they begin to thrive.  The struggle, it will always be there.  We aren't promised that things will be good and easy all of the time.  

1 Timothy 4:10 says "That is why we labor and strive".  We work and struggle.  We work and struggle.  We grown and stretch.  We grow and stretch.  It's not for our glory that we finally get to bloom.  It's literally, for HIS glory that the world gets to be a witness to all the goodness and beauty that our story brings to the world.  

I still find myself grieving for what once was.  We had a beautiful home and were surrounded by family for 16 years.  We brought home all 5 of our babies to that house, 2 were handed to us at our threshold there.  I still grieve for my Granny who lived next to us and for the security we had in having my parents across the street.  I find myself starting to grieve those things and that's okay.  The thing is, I can't stay dormant long because God planted us so very perfectly.  We were meant to thrive.
​
​It's all for His glory.

Have you ever reflected on you life and thought, "How could God even use me?"  Do you feel very insignificant and alone?  Do you feel bound by the little life you have and the mundane tasks you are in charge of daily while admiring others who have found a higher calling?  Nothing in your life has ever happened that seems significant enough for a powerful testimony that God can use?  It was only a few years back that I felt this way, but I had this feeling inside of me that called me to do something bigger.  It's a very confusing thing to feel one way about your life and being called to do the opposite.

Take a deep breath.  

Four little words that play through our minds when we feel like things are spiraling out of control, when we feel like we are losing our grip, when the unexpected just took control over our day; take a deep breath.

Go ahead, breathe in deep.
Now, let it out.
Do it again and again until you feel the calm sweep back over you.
Your heart rate steadies, your blood pressure comes down, and you can focus on what truly matters. 

You know that place where you go to hide, to be alone for awhile?  For some of us, it might be under the sheets, curled up in the corner of the couch, in our cars after pulling in the drive way, or even in a hot shower so you can hear nothing except the water streaming down.

We all have that place.  We all have those reasons.  Maybe you need to escape, maybe you are afraid, maybe you have let your thoughts run amuck and just need a minute to settle them down.  Maybe you are weary from fear and shame; and the burdens of life are weighing heavy.  You just need to escape and hide.

In 2015, I was in a real spiritual battle.  My husband and I were embarking on something that the Lord had called us to do and within that the Devil knew that God was placing us into the battle for a purpose.  We remain victorious as long as we are in His Will.  Let me take you back to a journal entry.

We all have those days that just don't go as planned.  We can all relate to feeling like we have too much on our plate and we just don't know how we are going to do it all.  The day to day can feel overwhelming, much less the year to year to do list.   I'm so thankful that this method of organizing my anxious thoughts and to do list works...

In my circle of friends I have a girl friend that is expecting her first baby...well, babies.  She is expecting twins.  They are little miracles who we have waited for and waited for.  ​

Psalm 91 is the key to winning the spiritual battles going on around you.  It's the key to winning your day.  As a foster mom, I see first hand the spiritual battle going on.

Just this morning as I was dropping off my beautiful foster baby girl in the nursery I was fussing about her dress and her perfectly placed bow and sounding completely exhausted about how we are never on time and that I'm the last to take care of me. ​

If there is one thing I know, the more you walk in God's Will the more determined the devil is to get involved.  I understand now why God allows him too.
Writing about this topic below is painful and scary to share.  I pray now my dear one that if you are reading this, it gives you permission to ask God for help...to be complete in brokenness...to be sifted...to be healed.  We are all broken together.
Broken...
that is a word that has been surfacing so much lately.  It is in music, it is in conversations, it is in things around the house, it is in the air.
Broken...
This morning I was cleaning up the kitchen and putting away items and inside a basket was my favorite salt shaker...broken.  I had dropped it full.  It had been in 1 piece just as I liked it but now it lay in 4 pieces and I didn't have the heart to toss it. I reached in our kitchen junk drawer and pulled out the glue.  I carefully pieced my little salt shaker back together.  Almost like new.  I filled it with salt and sat it next to the mate. ​